Hello Sir or Madam,

As we move into November, I’m reminded that this is a time for reflection—for giving thanks not only for what we have, but for what we seek. The holidays often stir big questions about meaning, purpose, and faith—questions that don’t always have easy answers.

This month’s reflection, “Looking for Answers,” grew out of one such moment and feels fitting for a season when gratitude and mystery often meet.

Michael Cowl Gordon, M.D.
michaelcowlgordon.com

"Looking for Answers"

I was in the local supermarket a few months ago when my phone rang. The call was from the husband of my second cousin, a dear woman who was in the midst of a decline due to pancreatic cancer. He said, “Mike, I just finished reading your book, Seeking a Higher Power. I was looking for answers, and I found answers.” We had a pleasant, meaningful chat, and I felt extremely grateful that I had taken the trouble to write and publish this book. The opportunity to help others is what the heroic journey is all about… and aren’t we all seeking answers? There are questions that ultimately, in my view, are not fully answerable, but we need to make the effort to seek to understand what life means to us.

Everybody gets to a place where tragedy strikes and the pain and seeming unfairness of life is deeply felt. At such times of personal suffering, we search for a deeper meaning to our lives. Often such thinking leads us to the thought of God, or a higher power. Many find the solution in religion, where God’s plans for us and His laws are explained. Others find that such explanations are too simple, or that they just don’t make sense.

Such seeking is a personal journey, and what I have come to understand is that at this level, the truth is true only for the individual that holds to it. To many people this doesn’t make sense either—usually, in my world, people who believe that the Bible holds all the answers they need.

The Chinese Tao-te Ching has a comment on this: “He who thinks he knows, doesn’t know. He who knows that he doesn’t know, knows.” The belief of many other great thinkers—from the thirteenth-century Christian mystic Meister Eckhart to twentieth-century philosopher and mythologist Joseph Campbell—has been that God cannot be thought about exactly as God is.

People seem to be naturally conditioned to believe in God, although many do not. As George Carlin said, “Tell people that there is an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.”

Because of my tendency to be rebellious, I have resisted letting people tell me what to believe (and what to do or what not to do). I was fortunate to have landed in twelve-step recovery, where I was given permission to seek a higher power of my own choosing.

My own truth has come to this: that there is a benevolent higher power in the universe for whom the creation of the universe had a purpose. This may not be entirely true, but it works for me, and I can selfishly say that it comforts me and makes me feel good to believe it.

I hope that when your life gets difficult - when you find yourself needing answers - you will indeed seek answers… and that what you find is comforting.

Resistance and Refusal

of the Call

In Joseph Campbell’s formulation of the heroic journey, two of the eight stages of the journey involve the reluctance or refusal of the hero to participate in or to continue in the quest. This is of great interest and critical importance in understanding the trajectory of addiction recovery, which I view as a heroic journey. The first refusal is the refusal l of the call to adventure. Here the hero has not accepted the challenge of recovery from the addiction. As we have discussed elsewhere, and as I pointed out in my book, The Twelve Step Pathway...

A Small Practice - Wake up with Gratitude

Get into the habit of thinking of something to be grateful for before you get out of bed in the morning. When you wake up try to be conscious of your breathing. This in itself is something to be grateful for. If you remember to do this, wonderful. If you forget, once you realize this, take the next moment to remember to breathe and to be grateful for something.

If you develop this habit, you will naturally experience more gratitude in your life.

A Line to Carry

“Compassion is the healing principle that makes life possible. I think of compassion as the fundamental religious experience and, unless that it there, you have nothing.” – Joseph Campbell

As I wrote in my most recent book, Seeking a Higher Power: A Guide to the Second Step, it is by means of compassion that we can relate to others at the point of their great sorrow. It is where we can reach our full human potential. It is the end of our fear of
others, and our isolation from the rest of the world.

Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel has this to say about compassion: “When religion speaks only in the name of authority rather than the voice of compassion, its message becomes meaningless.” And Archbishop Desmond Tutu has written that through compassion we are at our most human when he says, “We are wired to be compassionate.”

Speaking Engagements & Workshops

As the holidays approach, many in recovery face unique emotional and spiritual challenges. I offer in-person and virtual speaking engagements, workshops, and reflective sessions designed to support individuals and teams through this meaningful season.